Is there anyone left on the planet who hasn't been offered a Gmail invite?

Hey, you — yeah, you, in the cave on Mindanao: didn't you get the word World War II ended a while back?

No?

Well, no wonder you haven't received a Gmail invite.

Your 60–year wait is over.

Simply visit isnoop.com/gmail and pick up your invitation.

The site has distributed 1,142,251 Gmail invites since it went up on September 13 of last year.

They currently have 1,246,276 invites available for the asking.

So now what's your excuse?

Full disclosure: I do not now have — nor do I plan anytime in the near future to get — Gmail.

I've been offered about 1,246,276 invites to date and have turned them all down.

Why?

Why not?