My Analyst 8–Ball

For $7.95 you get a 3.75" plastic ball (above) "with the patience, compassion and sensitivity of the best shrink in town."

Hard to argue with a pitch like that, what?

"Unload all your whacked–out theories, fears and dreams onto My Analyst, then turn the ball over and follow its lead."

You'll feel better immediately and "you won't receive a bill that sends you into another panic attack."

Go to your happy place.

That will be $150, thank you.

We accept all major (and most minor) credit cards.