Alligator Lamp

Sometimes I just like the way something looks.

I admit it: Oscar Wilde's penetrating epigram, "Only the shallow judge by more than appearances," long ago burrowed deep into my reptilian brain.

Which is why, perhaps, this Alligator Lamp has crawled out onto your computer screen.

"Swiveling, pivoting Alligator Lamp lets you read in dark places and work in tight spaces — hands free!"

Tell us more.

From the website:

Clip an Alligator Lamp to your cap and you can read in pitch darkness.

Just flip up the head to activate twin unbreakable LEDs that protrude from raised pods.

Aim at any angle through 180° to project bright light right where it's needed.

Heavy–duty clip keeps your hands free for exacting close–up work and emergency repairs.

Clips to anything up to 1/2" thick.

Two included lithium coin cell batteries give over 100 hours of light.

Comes in Goldenrod, Khaki, Moss or Burnt Orange.

$19.95 here. (Cap not included.)

Now don't go getting your knickers in a twist thinking this is the long–sought perfect bedtime reading lamp: 2 LEDs is just not enough to do the job.

But I'm glad you're still hopeful; me too.

If we work together eventually we'll find it.

That's a promise — or I will cheerfully refund every penny you've spent here.

With interest.

More or less.

Depending.