Not iPod Glasses

If Steve Jobs wore these to the next Apple event unveiling its newest creations and said these were iPod glasses that came with built–in iTunes software and speech recognition so you could simply say the name of a song and it would be instantly imported — wirelessly — into the flash memory built into the frames, people would cheer and scream with joy.

Too bad it won't be happening — at least, not this coming January it won't.

But look on the bright side: with these glasses you can probably go lots of places you otherwise couldn't get into.

Though perhaps you wouldn't want to get into those places.

Never mind.

These glasses were designed to let you focus with less eyestrain "while watching TV or reading."

The website says they're "great for those who are nearsighted, farsighted, have cataracts, astigmatism, or struggle to read small print."

They sure didn't leave a whole lot of people out, what?

$19.99 here.

As you read this I have no doubt those waycool girls at Amy Sacks Eyewear — some of my very most favorite homeys on our blue planet — are ordering some so they can take them back out to their skunkworks and backward engineer them to find out how they work.