You meet the most interesting people in the obituaries

For a long time now I've been a regular reader of the New York Times and Washington Post obituaries.

From them I've learned of the existence of people who, after their deaths, began to powerfully influence my life.

The philosopher E. M. Cioran (above and below) is the first name to spring to mind but there have been — and continue to be — many others.

The fun never stops though the heart, alas, does.

So I was most interested to read, directly beneath the masterful Los Angeles Times obituary of bonsai master Frank Okamura — awarded the Order of the Sacred Treasure with Silver Rays by Japan in 1981 — which appeared in the Washington Post on January 30, the following in the Post:

News Obituaries

A news obituary is a staff–written article that summarizes a person's life.

It does not include funeral service arrangements or information on memorial contributions.

For information on what is required for a news obituary, call 202-334-7389 or go to www.washingtonpost.com/obituaries.

News obituaries can be faxed to 202-334-6553 or emailed to newsobits@washpost.com.

After sending the information, you must call 202-334-6477 to talk with a reporter.

We will not publish a news obituary more than a month after a death.

There is no cost for a news obituary.

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Huh.

I read the above information about six times and I still don't understand exactly what's what.

Let me see: there are two phone numbers, a fax number, a website and an email address that need to be employed in a specific order.

And even then you may end up with nothing.

I think I'd rather just read the obituaries than try to become part of creating them: the Post's recipe seems alarmingly like that for sausage, which we really would rather not know.

TMI is an acronym for things other than Three Mile Island.