How to guarantee I won't feature your whatever in bookofjoe

Send me daily emails with websites or products or designs, concluding with the instruction, "Please review it on your website."

Even more likely to evoke a snicker of derision from all of us here at bookofjoe World Headquarters is an offer of a loaner to try out for two or three weeks.

Excuse me?

A loaner?

So I'm supposed to remember to send it back and pay for the return myself?

This really happens all the time — just ask Shawn Lea, head of my crack research team.

You want me to consider featuring whatever you've got, you send it to me and I like it or trash it or whatever but it sure ain't coming back to you.