i-wood 3B — Clarke's Third Law* in action

Long story short: Not a splinter group but, rather, the new new thing in telecommunications.

Features like Phone, Mail, Web,

Music, 3B and Touch.

Can your device survive a thousand foot drop?

Didn't think so.

From the website:

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i-wood 3B

 

With our exclusive 3B* technology, fast connection speeds, support for those of us who live in reality, and our all new applications, i-wood is the all-in-one solution you have been looking for.

It will help you redefine your relationships with people by showing them how truly irritating they, and their portable devices, have become.

The All New i-wood with 3B Technology is individually silk screened onto environmentally sustainable bamboo plywood.

Because of this, each i-wood is different and will have minor deviations that are all part of a real analog process.

Specs:

4.5"H x 3"W x 0.25"D.

Natural side cut bamboo plywood.

Printed with speedball water-based ink

3.5" (diagonal) Tactile Touch®™ Display

Rechargeable gyroscope battery

Up to 1 million hours talk time

Operating temperature range: -273.15°C to 390°C

Maximum operating altitude: 100,000,000 ft.

 

Sensors:

Accelerometer

Proximity sensor

Light sensor

Infrared sensor

Sensor sensor for sensing sensers

Sensi Senser

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$10.

These folks are so all over it: they even have an App store up and running, with these Apps: Junk, Tiny Map, Useless Crap, Know-It-All, Meeting Ignore, Fantasy World, Tech Addict, Teleporter, Status Symbol, Garage Door Opener, Death, Timewaster, Beat Down, Boring, Invisibility and Friend-B-Gone.

Bonus: They're all free, the way we like it.

My fave is Teleporter (below).

This device is a perfect example of Clarke's Third Law.*

[via Ray Earhart , who added, "Up your alley? I think I found one!" — sure did, Ray]