June 12, 2012
Helpful Hints from joeeze: How to have the Apple Store Genius Bar all to yourself*
Free, the way we like it, too.
It's simple and obvious and yet I bet few people ever do it.
All right, all right, joe — spit it out already.
Oh, yeah, sorry.
All you have to do is wait till there's a powerful thunderstorm, preferably with high winds and serious lightning, then get in your car and head for the Apple Store.
It'll be just you and the store's employees, bored beyond belief and happy to give you an hour-long tutorial that'll move you to the head of the TechnoDolt©™® class.
For extra-special treatment, mention I sent you.
*To the reader who emailed me with a suggestion for obtaining the same result in any conditions, not just during bad weather: Eewwwww!!!!
June 12, 2012 at 02:01 PM | Permalink
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When the Earth doth quaketh do the Geniuses remain at their stations?
OR, you could, like me, use the Superbowl as a convenient shopping period. I've bought more than a few suits on that Sunday - the sales staff leave me the heck alone until I want their assistance (alterations are always chalked/pinned in the changing area where the illicit TV resides. Ah, but would the Apple Geniuses be interested in the game? I think not. Those that follow football would have traded their day with those who do not. Ergo - empty Apple Store.
Posted by: 6.02*10^23 | Jun 12, 2012 6:48:47 PM
I wonder if the mystery reader's alternative all-to-yourself tactic involves some egregious flouting of generally accepted personal hygiene standards, or possibly a feigning of illness kind of thing.
I have discovered that, at least around these parts, there is a day and time that 95% guarantees a have-things-to-yourself situation, and that is Friday (not a long weekend holiday Friday, though - just a regular Friday) pretty much exactly between the hours of 2 and 5 p.m. Everyone's tearing home to prepare for their night out or in, and the roads are a nightmare but the stores are heaven. Almost deserted. After 5 p.m. the teeming hordes start to invade, so you have to time things just right. Of course, if you have to travel on the highways to reach the deserted stores, you're pretty much screwed.
Posted by: Flautist | Jun 12, 2012 3:34:05 PM
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