On expecting nothing as a way to improve the quality of your life in a heartbeat

In recent months I've been thinking about how it is that I find fault with others so often for so many reasons.

I finally stepped back and thought about the overarching emotion that encompasses all these perceived failures by others: I expect from them what I expect from myself and when, invariably, they fall short, I get angry or annoyed.

But I have begun — I say begun because it is a process so fundamental to my way of looking at the world that I have to catch myself falling back into my old habit many times daily — to turn this around 180° and a whole new mindset has begun to take hold at the very core of my philosophy and way of being.

Just as I am at the center of my world, every other person on the planet is at the center of theirs.

So when I don't receive the kind of attention or action I want, I assume the other person has decided I'm not worth their focus.

Nothing could be further from the reality of the perceived failure.

The other sees me as a peripheral occurence in their own self-centric world.

This is fine.

It is as it should be.

The fault is never with the other person: it is always with me, with my own perception that somehow I am owed anything by anyone else.

When you ignore me, I am fine with that.

When you don't respond to a reasonable question, well, guess what? 

It wasn't a reasonable question — because if it had been, you would have responded.

Bottom line: set the bar for what I expect so low that it essentially rests on the ground. 

Let it stay there for the rest of my life.

Everything and anything people do that makes me happy is a gift.

And as I begin to understand the power this suddenly refocused point of view brings to every waking minute, my perception of myself and others takes on an entirely different aspect.

Just the initial returns from this whole new take on things are rich and deep.

I see also now why I am so madly in love with Gray Cat: she too expects nothing but accepts the love she gets with unmitigated pleasure and joy.