Massage Pen

It's the one on the right above.

It's a real ballpoint pen with a secret feature known only to you: a massaging top, which activates when you put it against something.

The copy on the website advocates "a pressure point."

Far be it from me to add anything to the copywriter's recommendation.

The pen comes with "diagrams mapping out various spots for remedying stress."

Once again, res ipsa loquitur.

Battery-operated (batteries included); refillable; 5.5" long.

$20.

Or, if you like you can get the laughing pen - that's the one on the left, with a little speaker on top that emits a 20-second belly laugh "sure to elicit chuckles from anyone in the vicinity."

It's also $20.

Or buy them both for $34.

The choice is yours.