50-Foot Woman Hair Clip

Everyone needs a shower now and then and giantesses are no exception.

The company marketing this is trying a stealth approach, what with putting the device in a grilling supply catalog.

We know better.

From the website:

Roast Slicing Tongs

An ingenious way to hold securely and evenly an eye of round roast, tenderloins or french bread.

Just insert your knife between the cast aluminum tines to slice.

Holds roast up to 6" dia.

Dishwasher-safe.

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$19.99 (roast not included).