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October 22, 2006

BehindTheMedspeak: One fish, two fish...

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Enough already with stories about how eating fish is a good thing, dangerous, or some combination of the two.

You know things are out of control when the New York Times, as it did this past Thursday, October 19, 2006, headlines an editorial, "Touting the Benefits of Fish."

The concluding sentence: "Better labeling on packages of fish or at the fish counter could make it easier to figure out which fish to eat and which to avoid."

Guess what?

It doesn't matter one iota in terms of your and your future health.

Zero.

Nada.

Zilch.

Why?

Long story short: You'll never hear, much less see, the bullet that's got your name on it.

While you're ever so carefully studying your good fish/bad fish list, a runaway shopping cart manned by some idiotstick kid will crash into you and knock you silly.

Once you wake up — assuming you do — you won't know a fish from a fondue.

Red fish, blue fish... don't sweat it — you'll be swimming with 'em soon enough.

October 22, 2006 at 04:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Packing Peanut Cornucopia

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I'd never seen so many different types

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of those annoying things in one place as in my new

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Papermart catalog.

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Five varieties (above and below) to choose from,

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two colors, even a biodegradable offering.

October 22, 2006 at 03:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBack

Darwin Online — The Complete Works

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Now open here — and free — is "the largest collection of Darwin's writings ever assembled."

"This site currently contains more than 50,000 searchable text pages and 40,000 images of both publications and handwritten manuscripts."

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Created by Cambridge University, it will be complete by 2009.

[via Alan Cane in the October 20 Financial Times]

October 22, 2006 at 02:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Johnny-Light — 'Aim to please, even in the dark!'

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The product's tagline isn't half bad but it doesn't begin to make up for that dreadful name.

I mean, come on: pre-schoolers given this to play with could do better.

From websites:

    Johnny-Light™

    Unique Johnny-Light toilet seat floods the bowl with soft green light when the lid is lifted, preventing nighttime accidents.

    Helpful for potty-training children and a great reminder to lower the seat when finished.

    Uses 2 AAA batteries (included).

    Fits standard toilets.

    Plastic.

....................

I've still got two openings for next spring's bookofjoe Product Naming Seminar™: whoever thought this one up ought to get their deposit in yesterday.

$14.

October 22, 2006 at 01:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Copyediting Shakespeare

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Thomas Christensen shows us what might happen if Will were to happen into our world.

It's not pretty — but it is most amusing and instructive.

[via Thomas Christensen's rightreading.com]

October 22, 2006 at 12:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

4-in-1 Retractable Reflecting Ice-Breaking Traction-Gripper Snow Shovel — 'Don't leave Nome without it!'

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I like it.

Memo to file: Find out who wrote that line incorporating Nome for the catalog's product description and woo them away to bookofjoe with a compensation package that's impossible to resist.

Now where was I?

Foam.

No, that's not right, wait a minute....

Oh, yeah, this tricked-out snow shovel.

From the website:

    4-in-1 Snow Shovel

    Don’t leave Nome without it!

    Multi-component snow shovel stores easily in your vehicle and performs a range of roadside functions:

    • Shovels snowdrifts

    • Detachable handle with stainless-steel blade chops through ice

    • Detachable traction aids restore tire grip on ice

    • Serves as a nighttime highway reflector

    Compact unit retracts from 39" down to 27" long.

    High-impact polypropylene.

....................

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$39.99 (snow not included).

October 22, 2006 at 11:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Autobiography: New York — by Melanie Rehak

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Returning alone after long absence
I was engulfed. No novel, no play
had prepared me for this,
the arched November trees
glazed with ice, the night-emptied
sidewalks chipped with mica
in silent offering.
I had left it all behind
and here—it rose! The City's
fiery parcels all undone
.

It was the season of regret
and the great wave of first
love lost swept over me.
Catching the buildings'
hooded eyes from afar—
my true paramours!—I was
adolescent with longing
for everything laid out
before me, down on my knees
in the frigid air, on the first
night, asking for benevolence,
second chances without end.
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Newyork
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October 22, 2006 at 10:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

World's Finest Marshmallows — at over $1 apiece, they better be

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I've never had a "handcrafted marshmallow" — have you?

But I wouldn't mind trying one or ten.

From the website:

    Handcrafted Marshmallows

    Our heavenly marshmallows are a labor of love — three full days go into their preparation.

    Confectioners begin by cooking together whisked egg whites and syrup in copper kettles before adding Madagascar vanilla.

    The airy mixture is then poured onto marble slabs to cool and set.

    Finally, the confection is hand cut into perfect little squares that are individually dusted.

    Drop a few in a steaming cup of hot chocolate, where they’ll slowly melt into a smooth, rich topping.

    You can also toast them over a fire or dip them in chocolate fondue.

    No matter how you enjoy them, their old-fashioned goodness is sure to delight.

....................

Chocolate (top) or Vanilla (below).

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18 for $18.50.

October 22, 2006 at 09:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack

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