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September 27, 2008

The Ill-Tempered Clavier — by Carolita Johnson

Caj

Via Carolita Johnson's newyorkette where she writes, in response to the question "How can I become a cartoonist?": "Fail at everything else first."

Now get on with it.

September 27, 2008 at 04:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Elvis Wall Clock

Ijuu

From the website:

    Elvis Wall Clock

    Originally, the studio wanted Elvis's 1968 TV special to portray The King in a powder blue tux singing Christmas carols — we like the rockin' "leather version" much better.

    Celebrate his shining moment with our handsome 12" diameter tempered glass wall clock.

    Uses one AA battery (not included).

$23.

September 27, 2008 at 03:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Lawyer's Body Double: Crime, Italian-Style

4fytrty

The news broke in yesterday's Corriere della Sera; here's Rachel Donadio's item from the New York Times.

    Italy: Lawyer Accused of Using a Double

    An Italian lawyer has been charged with fraud and false representation because she is suspected of having her identical twin sister fill in for her during court hearings, the Italian newspaper Corriere della Sera reported Friday. The lawyer, identified only as Gabriella, was also a part-time judge near Milan, helping other judges with heavy caseloads. But when she had to fill both roles, she twice sent her sister, Patrizia, who is not a lawyer, in her place, collecting legal fees even when she was elsewhere, the newspaper reported. It said the sisters would be tried in Brescia next month.

...................

Here's the automated Google translation of the Corriere della Sera article, which was reported by Maddalena Brunetti and Luigi Ferrarella.

    The trick of the Judge Advocate — At sends the twin

    Exchange of identities to manage the two professions. Will be processed. Hearings contested in '98 and 2001

    With a reassuring adage providing ensures that in any court is somewhat 'lawyer, Gabriella nell'avvocato that was supposed to be — in front of the Civil Court of Vigevano — could not be anything of the court fees that would always Gabriella simultaneously to be a Rho sub-office in the Court of Milan. And so, while others remained on the processes in Rho to decide in his capacity as honorary judge, to recite the party instead of itself in Vigevano, that is the cause of debate in the courts of that court, Gabriella sent the face-off and more resembles that no formidable casting, even a colossus of Hollywood, could find: the face of itself.

    Why sent his twin sister, Patrizia. However even a lawyer, but only graduated. Through this exchange of person, twin lawyer/honorary magistrate (Gabriella), for reasons that appeared to have sponsored a Vigevano when to wear the toga of lawyer was not the lawyer sister (Patrizia), he could expect from their customers pay their plots. And when the money did not arrive spontaneously turned to the Court of Rho because ordering customers to pay, adding as evidence the relevant files of cases, records that in theory he presence and performance in the hearings, and the settlement accepted by 'Lawyer of Milan. Cards in November and December 2003 mislead the court and lead to issue two injunction with regard to customers Tapinassi lawyer pay 2667 euros and 1736 euros plus interest. But now that the exchange in person came to light, albeit a long distance from the galley hearings of 22 September 1998 and 29 May 2001 in Vigevano, the boomerang affects both the drops of water yesterday, the two sisters are fifties in fact been returned to court for "false ideology committed by the public official acts in public."

    And on October 15 before the Court of Brescia (agency on crimes involving those who exercise judicial functions in the district of Milan, like his sister who was also honorary judge) the only true twin lawyer and also an honorary magistrate will be processed and for "false ideology in certificates in the legal profession," and "fraud" against two clients, implemented with the deception of the Court that issued the injunction.

....................

Painful, what?

Here's the original.

    Il trucco del giudice-avvocato All'udienza manda la gemella

    Scambio di identità per gestire le due professioni. Sarà processata. Le udienze contestate nel '98 e nel 2001

    2rytrytr

    Per quanto un rassicurante adagio garantista assicuri che in ogni giudice c'è un po' di avvocato, nell'avvocato che Gabriella avrebbe dovuto essere — di fronte al Tribunale civile di Vigevano — non poteva esserci nulla del giudice onorario che sempre Gabriella avrebbe contemporaneamente dovuto essere a Rho nella sezione distaccata del Tribunale di Milano. E così, mentre sui processi altrui restava a Rho a decidere nella veste di giudice onorario, a recitare invece la parte di se stessa a Vigevano, e cioè dell'avvocato delle cause in discussione davanti ai giudici di quest'altro tribunale, Gabriella mandava il volto più azzeccato e somigliante che nessun formidabile casting, nemmeno di un colosso di Hollywood, avrebbe potuto scovare: il volto di se stessa.

    Perché mandava sua sorella gemella, Patrizia. Peraltro nemmeno avvocato, ma soltanto laureata. Grazie a questo scambio di persona, la gemella avvocato/ magistrato onorario (Gabriella), per le cause che figurava aver patrocinato a Vigevano quando invece a indossare la toga di avvocato era stata la gemella non avvocato (Patrizia), ha poi potuto pretendere dai propri clienti il pagamento delle relative parcelle. E quando i soldi non sono arrivati spontaneamente, si è rivolta al Tribunale di Rho perché ordinasse ai clienti di pagare, allegando come prova i relativi fascicoli delle cause, i verbali che in teoria ne attestavano presenza e prestazioni nelle udienze, e la liquidazione ammessa dall'Ordine degli avvocati di Milano. Carte che nel novembre e dicembre 2003 traggono in inganno il Tribunale e lo inducono a emettere due decreti ingiuntivi con l'ordine ai tapini clienti della avvocato di pagarle 2.667 euro e 1.736 euro più interessi. Ora però che lo scambio di persona è venuto a galla, seppure a distanza di molto tempo dalle udienze galeotte del 22 settembre 1998 e del 29 maggio 2001 a Vigevano, anche il boomerang colpisce entrambe le gocce d'acqua: ieri le due sorelle cinquantenni sono infatti state rinviate a giudizio per «falso ideologico commesso dal pubblico ufficiale in atti pubblici».

    E il 15 ottobre davanti al Tribunale di Brescia (competente sui reati che coinvolgono chi esercita funzioni giudiziarie nel distretto di Milano, come appunto la sorella che era anche giudice onorario) la sola gemella vera avvocato e anche magistrato onorario sarà processata pure per «falso ideologico in certificati nell'esercizio della professione forense», nonché per «truffa » ai danni dei due clienti, attuata con il raggiro del Tribunale che emise i decreti ingiuntivi.

September 27, 2008 at 02:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

What is it?

Mmmmmmm

Answer here this time tomorrow.


September 27, 2008 at 01:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

failblog — The spirit of Samuel Beckett lives

Jp9i9

[via Blythe]

September 27, 2008 at 12:01 PM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Giant Inflatable Alien — Might even make the cop laugh and not give you a ticket for using the HOV lane

Alien_lrg_2

From the website:

    Giant Inflatable Alien

    Do you need to skip out of work early?

    Need a long lunch?

    Or perhaps you want your boss to think you work long hours.

    Just put this giant inflatable alien in your desk chair and see if anyone notices.

    We have a hunch she'll be just as productive as you are.

    Stands six feet tall, with three extra-long spooky fingers.

    A great gag gift for those who walk around with aluminum foil hats.

....................

Green (Doh!).

$12.89.

September 27, 2008 at 11:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

A Most Wanted Man — by John le Carré

Lijipj

Sure, you could pre-order it today, then wait till October 7, 2008 when it's released in the U.S. — but why would you want to do that when you can buy it now and be reading it by next Wednesday?

That's my plan.

Just one of the many perks resulting from subscribing to — and reading cover to cover — The Financial Times and The Economist.

Bonus: if you do it my way you get the way cooler U.K. cover (top) rather than the anemic U.S. iteration (below).

Iu8o_2

Case closed.

September 27, 2008 at 10:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Knuckle Brush — by Ken Goldman

1gffttg

All of a sudden the knuckle space hots up.

2trytry

"Girls, get this for your husband or boyfriend
to ensure he cleans for you

3ryrteryt

while maintaining his toughness and masculinity."

4stgdrs

Apply within.

[via Trendhunter]

September 27, 2008 at 09:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

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