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April 11, 2016

Who wants to go to Pittsburgh with me? 2nd request

1

My initial post last Monday engendered a number of "I'd love to, but..." responses.

If at first I don't succeed sometimes I give up but other times, like now, I persist.

So.

I'm driving to Pittsburgh (round trip) later this month, leaving Charlottesville on a Friday around 8 a.m. and planning to arrive around 2 p.m.

I will leave Pittsburgh the following Monday morning around 8 a.m., arriving back home here in Charlottesville around 2 p.m.

I don't like driving long distances any more, and to me the 325 miles between Charlottesville and Pittsburgh constitutes a long distance.

......................................................

REQUIREMENTS AND DETAILS

I'm looking for someone to do all the driving while I sit in the passenger seat noodling around on my iPad and reading and sleeping.

No radio or music: silent other than whatever conversation happens.

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WHY YOU MIGHT WANT TO VOLUNTEER FOR THIS MISSION

• I charge $500/hour for my time so you will get $6,000 worth of anything and everything I have to offer. Or I can just be quiet (I'm quite good at that: your call).

• You will be safe: as a board-certified anesthesiologist of some 35 years, I am an expert in CPR and Advanced Cardiac Life Support as well as maintaining an emergency airway — to that end I keep in my car's trunk all the instruments and ancillary materials required to perform endotracheal intubation on the roadside, an emergency cricothyroidotomy kit, and a functioning Ambu bag and mask. There's also an up-to-date EpiPen in case you're allergic to something. But I digress.

• You will have wonderful stories to tell your friends and grandchildren: I will regale you with tales of unimaginable things I've done that will never, ever, appear in bookofjoe for any number of reasons.

• You will be driving a 2010 Mercedes-Benz C300 with All-Wheel Drive and 48,000 miles on the odometer; it has extremely comfortable seats, is utterly silent and smooth, and very safe what with stuff like headrests that stiffen when the car senses an upcoming impact, etc. Very high-tech. I bought it used in 2013 for $29,000, with 44,000 miles.

• You pay nothing: I pay for gas, meals, any snacks you might want, drinks (non-alcoholic), souvenirs of the trip you might want to pick up at rest stops along the Pennsylvania Turnpike.

• Google Maps on my iPad will give us end-to-end spoken and visual directions so you don't have to have a clue about how to get there.

• I will give you a $100 cash bonus as soon as we arrive back in Charlottesville.

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You're not going to get a better offer anytime soon so don't dilly-dally: my email is bookofjoe@gmail.com 

April 11, 2016 at 08:01 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

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